2010

I remember this time last year, thinking that 2009 was going to be amazing. Well, it really wasn't. In fact, it pretty damn well beat me into submission. So much so that I'm scared to be hopeful for 2010, which in itself is very depressing.

Blah.

And blah again.

I'm so tired...

Poetry and Oprah

I had a dream last night that Oprah was asking to see some of my poetry. I didn't want her to be disappointed so I rummaged through notebooks, pretending to see if I had any examples and tehn had to tell her, "Sorry. I don't have any with me."

She was disappointed anyway, which bummed me out. I told her, "But I've written a bunch of books." I was going to give her copies but she didn't seem that interested and said, "Yeah, maybe I'll pick those up." But I knew from the way she said that she probably wouldn't.

It's important to note that I don't really write poetry and evidently, neither does Dream Me. Dream Me didn't want to tell Oprah that though.

Am I spelling her name right? It looks weird to me. Not as weird as the dream though. Any dream experts out there who feel like explaining this to me? Because I am baffled.

But, she was nice nonetheless. There was other shit in there too, but I think that was the most important part.

You know what I hate? Soft toothpicks.

That is all.

K's New Toy

So, K bought an espresso machine yesterday. Today, while examining the tiny one ounce cups, I noticed that they were very high quality. Thick, heavy glass. I said, "Wow. You could huck one of these at someone's head and probably kill them."

I kinda got yelled at. "Only YOU would think of something like that!"

I probably made a face in response. Sheepish? Maybe. Befuddled? Probably.

But, really. Am I the only one who would think of something like that? Really?

I wonder...

The Shower Popper

Did I ever tell you about the spooky being I have come to call The Shower Popper? No, I know I didn't. Because it's embarrassing. But, in my house, there are several bathrooms. In one, where I like to do my thing, every so often-but not that often-once in a while, a shadowy figure will POP out of the shower while I'm on the john. That's pretty scary, right? Even more scary-the Shower Popper will sometimes even snap my picture just as it POPS out.

Usually, I scream. It is quite terrifying, as anyone who has ever been surprised while on a toilet will attest to.

Here is a picture of me the first time I was assaulted by the Shower Popper:



Yes, my hair was blue. It was a while ago.

Then, several months later, after I shaved my head from embarrasement, BAM, the Popper got me again:



And, later that same day, after I'd gathered my courage and talked myself into thinking I must have imagined the whole thing (Twice) the Shower Popper struck again!



As you can see, going into that bathroom is no picnic for me. But at least I have the photographic evidence of some sort of foul play. Or maybe it's PARANORMAL ACTIVITY?

You be the judge.

Oh, and why I wear enormous black shades with flames on the sides while I'm in the bathroom is none of your damn business. (It's a REALLY bright bathroom!)

my new pet

A little green and black bug flew into the pocket of my hoodie while I was outside walking my dog through the woods behind my house. I've named him Roger after my father outlaw and am feeding him extra strength Tums Smoothies (assorted fruit flavors) which he seems to like quite a bit. That and Komodo Dragon blend coffee, which makes him (or her I suppose) buzz even louder.

We're happy together. Nibble your hearts out.

new horizons

damn. I have been sick with H1N1 for two weeks, I think. maybe longer. hard to keep track of days when you spend most of them sleeping. but I'm getting a little better every day and should be back to (close to) 100% pretty soon. sweet throat and lung gunk, I'll miss you. don't forget to write now and then.

other cool shit on the horizon that I can't talk about in detail yet, but I'm pretty excited without getting my hopes up too much. needless to say, new, fun projects await, if all goes well.

I have stories to write now. godess bless understanding editors. I would be nowhere without them...

Witchy Poo

Poor neglected blog. I just wrote a nice little post but it was eaten and I'm not going to retype it. Blah. But I am alive. Just super busy and trying to get caught up. Will get back to this soon!

Hope you're all having a wonderful fall and beware of the spookies that come out to bite! <3

A Waterfall of Pus

That is how the back of my throat was described by my doctor the other day. Nice visual, eh? So, yeah, I've been super-sick and no one knows exactly what's going on, but I don't care anymore. I'm getting better now-or at least I FEEL better now-but I'm on lots of drugs, including prednisone, amoxicillin, and tramadol, among other things.

I had to miss a reading in Portland the other night and for once I was actually looking forward to doing one, since it was a vegan gathering, but I was in no mood or shape to drive 7+ hours to maybe sell a couple copies. Plus my voice was shot anyway.

I think I might almost be ready to get back in the saddle as far as work goes, so that's cool. It's been one delay after another this year, but I'm still trying to be positive about everything.

Guess I'm too tired to write more than this right now. Be back later with more...

Mite of the People

High!

I think this blog has a virus or something. Well, not this particular blog, but blogger. My computer hates it. So, I don't know how much longer I'll be keeping up this journal. I might switch over to Xanga or something like that. If so, I will definitely post a link here though, so fret not little lambs.

Unless someone can tell me what the frog is up with this thing and how to fix it. That would make me even happier than the time I found a little green kitten outside my door. She's actually gray, but she was covered in green paint. I think she was pretending to be a lizard. Cats do stuff like that all the frigging time. They think it's funny.

Ok, I'm out. Go pinch your wife's/husband's butt for me. When they give you a weird look say, "Gina told me to!"

Alive

To all who have asked, yep, very much alive over here. Thanks for noticing my absence and for your concern! It's very much appreciated!

K's vasculitits is back though, which is the ultimate in suckage. Doctors remain clueless, but there are more appointments in the near future, so I guess you never know. Just trying to keep the faith that this will all clear up sooner than later.

Trying to get back to my zombie book, now titled PRAISE THE DEAD. Need to bury myself in it and do my best to put everything else out of my head.

That's it for now. LOVElovelove YOU!

Live Chat TONIGHT

If you've got nothing better to do, why not come chat with me over at the Haunt tonight? 8:30 PM EST. There will be spiked punch and cookies and probably a stripper or two. Hilarity will ensue, then we'll all bond and cry and hug and pretend it never happened the next time we see each other. You won't want to miss it!

http://www.horror-mall.com/haunt/

Another Biopsy

Apparently the results of the first one were "suspicious." So, they're gonna punch yet another hole in her. A bigger one.

Also, she has been really sick-running a high fever, blowing her brains out her nose, coughing, etc...

I think I'm on my way to a nervous breakdown.

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

Norwescon

I just spent the last couple days at Norwescon in SeaTac, Washington, having fun with my bizarro clan and meeting new friends and just generally having an awesome time at this sci-fi/fantasy convention. I'm happy to report that due to the hustle, humor and cute-ness factor of Jeff Burk and Cameron Pierce, ALL the books I brought ending up selling. First time that's ever happened, so thanks guys!

Incidentally, you should all buy Cameron's novella, Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden, and be on the lookout for Jeff's book ShatnerQuake, both from Eraserhead Press.

I planned writing more here today, but I'm just dead. Too much beer, next to no sleep and intense happiness makes for a very tired, sore G.

More later...

Update

So, K's tests came back fine. Nothing wrong that they could see. BUT--her legs are getting worse and the vasculitis is spreading upwards, all the way to her lower stomach now. And a really weird thing--even the slightest scratch anywhere on her body gets all inflamed and angry looking, spreading out and growing wider. The doctors are baffled at this point and took a biopsy from her leg. Also, she is scheduled to see a dermatologist Monday. So, we'll see how that goes I guess.

She's been really tired and is sleeping a lot.

I'm feeling a little better, but not a whole lot. Too worried to work, which sucks because I have deadlines. Meh.

If you don't know what vasculitis is, do a google image search to get an idea of what we're dealing with. Not pretty and scary as hell.

So...

K has been diagnosed with vasculitis. Sunday afternoon she was fine, Sunday evening her lower legs were covered in red dots and welts. Thinking it was an allergic reaction to something, I gave her some benedryl and assumed whatever it was would be gone by morning. It wasn't and our regular doc is on vacation. We went to the walk-in clinic and saw a nice guy who told us what it was and said it could be basically nothing or "something very bad." They took blood and urine from her and now we've been waiting for the results of those tests.

I'm trying very hard not to freak the fuck out. Usually, I'm the most calm person in the world. Even when I had a leukemia scare about a decade ago, I was perfectly calm and took the attitude "don't worry until you know for sure there is something to worry about." That is usually my motto.

Of course, that was me, not her.

The brave faced, tough chick mask that I wear is not holding up so well right now. I just hope it turns out to be nothing and I'll be able to laugh at how frightened I was.

Why aren't they calling back??????

Let There Be Light

I got tired of my dark, dark, dark all the time. What am I, a Goth? Nope. So, I think I'm gonna go with light for a while. But don't think this means I've gone all goody two shoes. I still roll for the Empire. Never doubt it! I'm just chilling with the Storm Troopers for a bit. Vader can hold down the fort in Tatooine while I'm gone.

(Is that right? I'm not as up on my Star Wars trivia as I should be.)

jojojojojojojojojojojojo

I'm dedicating this blog entry to the wonderful Jodi Lee because, not only does she kick ass and is a very cool woman, but I'm pretty sure she's the only one who ever reads this thing (except for, once in a blue moon, Bradley). And beyond that, this is my blog and I can do whatever the hell I want here. I can get verbally naked and dance around singing Go Tell It On The Mountain if I so choose.

But anyway, how are you Jodi? We have this place all to ourselves, so feel free to cuss out the whole planet if that's what you want to do. I know it's what I want to do sometimes. Damn planet. And it's not like those redneck Americans who always-like a broken fucking record-say "If you don't like America, leave!" I can't really leave the planet, though once in a while I wish I could. The moon, for example, would be a much more peaceful place to live. No neighbors cranking Abba, like the guy next door is doing right now. He sure does love his Abba. I wish I could make the first B backwards, like they (Abba) do. Those crazy Swedes.

I have a bit of a belly ache right now, probably from eating too much yellow curry. My stomach can't take spice like it used to.

So Jodi-where in Canada do you live? I know I probably already know the answer but I can't think of it right now for some reason. How are the kids? The job? The weather? I think I'll change the name of this journal to the Jodi and Gina Chat-A-Thon.

Believe it or not, I'm completely sober right now. I know--scares me too.

Bye for now, Jo-jo! Have a spectacular evening!

Shout it out, sister!

I love this chick. She's way fucking cooler than me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7Zpv3g8N6E&feature=channel_page

I couldn't have said it better myself.

Don't Trip

Awesome and freaky:

http://www.geekologie.com/2009/02/end_of_the_world_perspective_s.php

Easily Amused

I just bought a flashlight that's smaller than a cigarette. What will they think of next, eh?

Sleep is not my friend lately. Can't sleep during night hours for some reason, so--up all night, sleep all day. The life a rockstar, right? Kinda blows, actually. Might pull an all-nighter to try to break the cycle. Gloomy dark days probably aren't helping...

I keep looking at my strat in the corner. It's distracting. Saying "Play with me, damn you!" It's so pretty, how can I resist?

Ok, enough nonsense. Please visit www.ginaranalli.com for the real news of the day. It's 100% Premium News-Not From Concentrate.

Have my toes always looked like this?

Check this out!

http://www.aftonbladet.se/webbtv/sport/article4208764.ab

The video is in Swedish, but I think you'll get what's going on. 72 year old woman, way more buff than I'll ever be. Started training at 46-doing 55 push-ups. Amazing and inspiring.

In Mourning

Someone very close to me died two years ago today and it's hitting me like a fucking truck. I don't know what to do with myself. Trouble concentrating. There is no place dark enough to hide.

"I'm over...I'm over...I'm over...I'm broken."

Work Area

Just fiddling around here, tossing ideas back and forth with my editor and trying to get some work done. Sucking down some java, transcribing hand-written pages to the computer. Sat back and for some reason wanted to mark the moment with a pic. I took it just minutes ago and here is it, folks: where the magic happens. Exciting, eh? You can see I have my collection of Boogily Heads for inspiration, plenty of vitamins (because they are GOOD for you!) and even some deodorant because you just never know. And, yes, I scribble on pretty much everything.

Ok, that was fun for a minute. Back to work.

What It Takes

I'm really beginning to wonder if I have what it takes to "go all the way" in the writing biz. Whatever that may mean--which is different things to different people. I'm not even really sure what it means to me. But even at the level I'm at now, I'm finding certain things more than just a little unsavory.

I'm just not comfortable with the amount of self-whoring (for lack of a better term) it seems to entail. I see people, whose work I like and some I even consider friends, just whoring themselves to the point where it makes me nauseous and embarrassed for them. It is painful to see people begging for attention, begging others to buy their books, begging, begging, begging. Nominating themselves for things, for crying out loud.

The whole thing is distressing to me. Is that really what I'll have to do to get people to notice my work? Probably. Will I do it? Never to that degree. I'd rather go back to working a cash register, truth be told.

So maybe I don't have what it takes, after all. And I'm actually glad of that fact. Take it as you will, but I like my dignity exactly as it is, thanks.