Wednesday, November 18, 2009

K's New Toy

So, K bought an espresso machine yesterday. Today, while examining the tiny one ounce cups, I noticed that they were very high quality. Thick, heavy glass. I said, "Wow. You could huck one of these at someone's head and probably kill them."

I kinda got yelled at. "Only YOU would think of something like that!"

I probably made a face in response. Sheepish? Maybe. Befuddled? Probably.

But, really. Am I the only one who would think of something like that? Really?

I wonder...

Saturday, November 14, 2009

The Shower Popper

Did I ever tell you about the spooky being I have come to call The Shower Popper? No, I know I didn't. Because it's embarrassing. But, in my house, there are several bathrooms. In one, where I like to do my thing, every so often-but not that often-once in a while, a shadowy figure will POP out of the shower while I'm on the john. That's pretty scary, right? Even more scary-the Shower Popper will sometimes even snap my picture just as it POPS out.

Usually, I scream. It is quite terrifying, as anyone who has ever been surprised while on a toilet will attest to.

Here is a picture of me the first time I was assaulted by the Shower Popper:

Yes, my hair was blue. It was a while ago.

Then, several months later, after I shaved my head from embarrasement, BAM, the Popper got me again:

And, later that same day, after I'd gathered my courage and talked myself into thinking I must have imagined the whole thing (Twice) the Shower Popper struck again!

As you can see, going into that bathroom is no picnic for me. But at least I have the photographic evidence of some sort of foul play. Or maybe it's PARANORMAL ACTIVITY?

You be the judge.

Oh, and why I wear enormous black shades with flames on the sides while I'm in the bathroom is none of your damn business. (It's a REALLY bright bathroom!)

Thursday, November 12, 2009

my new pet

A little green and black bug flew into the pocket of my hoodie while I was outside walking my dog through the woods behind my house. I've named him Roger after my father outlaw and am feeding him extra strength Tums Smoothies (assorted fruit flavors) which he seems to like quite a bit. That and Komodo Dragon blend coffee, which makes him (or her I suppose) buzz even louder.

We're happy together. Nibble your hearts out.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

new horizons

damn. I have been sick with H1N1 for two weeks, I think. maybe longer. hard to keep track of days when you spend most of them sleeping. but I'm getting a little better every day and should be back to (close to) 100% pretty soon. sweet throat and lung gunk, I'll miss you. don't forget to write now and then.

other cool shit on the horizon that I can't talk about in detail yet, but I'm pretty excited without getting my hopes up too much. needless to say, new, fun projects await, if all goes well.

I have stories to write now. godess bless understanding editors. I would be nowhere without them...